"Them? Yeah, I've heard of them, but I haven't heard them."
Translation: I've never heard of them.
"Yeah, I've only heard like two or three of their songs."
Translation: I've heard of them but never actually heard them.
"Their new stuff is way better than their old stuff."
Translation: I've never heard their old stuff.
"They're good if you're into, like, the Smiths and the Cure."
Translation: I read the little "RIYL" box in CMJ, but I haven't heard them.
"I like their old stuff better."
Translation: I am a jerk.
"I listen to everything from Armenian speed metal to pan-European-Gypsy-post-punk."
Translation: I listen to System of a Down and Gogol Bordello.
7 comments:
i back these, even though i'm guilty of saying all of them save the last two. but you should also include: "pitchfork says that they're the next [insert ridiculous 80's group that no one gave a crap about in the first place i.e. squeeze]..."
Did you make these up?? Very good, very poignant. I hate admitting how true it is... because we all know we use these all the time.
For me, especially the last one.
(I kid.)
This is the best post ever.
Sadly, these are almost all things I have said, so yeah I did make them up. I got the last one from my friend Daniel, who used it as an example of how people try to make it sound like their taste in music is really broad and deep by pretending to be into whole genres when they really just like one band.
The ironic thing is, I've only heard like one or two songs by Gogol Bordello. If you know what I mean.
I think there will need to be a round 2 of this post. Keep the ideas coming...
Is it possible to like a band's older material without being a jerk??
Well, I guess I could arbitrate on a case-by-case basis. If you like old Weezer better than new Weezer, you're smart. If you think "Something About Airplanes" is better than anything else Death Cab for Cutie has done, you're a jerk. If anyone's confused about this system, just let me know, and I'll tell you the correct answers about other bands.
Arbitration is in session:
I like the early work of the following artists/bands better than more recent stuff:
Barenaked Ladies
Counting Crows
Iron and Wine
Josh Ritter
Van Morrison
Belle and Sebastian
Bob Dylan
The Beach Boys
Dave Matthews
M. Ward
U2
Marc Cohn
The White Stripes
Perhaps you could make a pie chart for me of what percent of me is jerk. :)
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